If you’ve spent any time on this blog, you might have picked up on the fact that I generally don’t share much about my kids online, other than some light-hearted stories—like my 4-year-old helping me with chores or that one time my child accidentally covered the kitchen in activated charcoal. I’m planning to have my sixth baby soon, and while I might discuss my birth experience and possibly post a picture or two, I won’t be sharing details like the baby’s name, weight, or exact birth date. Don’t expect a social media birth announcement either; I prefer announcing our joyful news to close friends and family through more personal channels like phone calls or texts.
I’ve received quite a few queries about why I don’t post photos or details of my kids on this blog or social media. Some have even speculated that I might not actually have kids or that I’m embarrassed by them. It’s amusing when someone assumes I’m secretly a single woman using someone else’s photos for profit. Truth is, I’m extremely proud of my kids, and I’d love to share pictures of them online, but I choose not to. My husband and I arrived at this decision after much thought and research, even extending it to our personal social media accounts.
It’s important to note that this is a personal decision for our family, not a judgment on how other parents handle sharing about their kids online. Technology today presents dilemmas our parents never faced. Growing up, our lives weren’t documented on social media since our parents didn’t have smartphones or Facebook. Back then, photos were cherished in family scrapbooks that were shared in person with close friends and family. For our children, future acquaintances or employers could easily find pictures documenting every personal and embarrassing moment from their childhood online.
The idea is, while I play a big role in raising these wonderful tiny humans—making important decisions like what they eat or how they’re taught about life—I don’t “own” them. I want them to decide how and what they share about themselves online when they’re older. Personally, I value privacy and wouldn’t appreciate someone sharing private moments of my life without consent, so I extend that same respect to my children. Nowadays, even teens tend to prefer social platforms that allow more privacy, like Snapchat. I want to leave room for my kids to choose anonymity if they treasure it as much as I do.
I read a tale about a woman instructed to scatter feathers from a tower to represent the spread of gossip that can’t be fully retracted. The internet operates similarly: once something is posted, it’s almost impossible to take back, as others can capture screenshots or save copies. That permanence is a big concern when it comes to my kids.
Even though I enjoy sharing parts of my life on this blog to connect with other moms, my children’s online privacy is paramount to me. While there’s a lot of pressure to present a certain image online, I prefer to keep my kids out of it because they deserve to decide their digital footprint when they’re ready. This isn’t a fear of social media—I use it for staying in touch. It’s simply my way of handling a complex issue and trying to ensure their right to privacy remains intact.
The potential dangers of oversharing aren’t reserved only for children. Some worry about identity theft, as shared details might be used to answer security questions on personal accounts. I’ve seen how stolen online information can create chaos, even if it’s not likely to happen. These considerations inspire me to approach online sharing with caution.
Though 97% of moms on Facebook do share about their kids, I choose not to follow that trend. I share pictures of my children in a way that maintains their privacy. It hasn’t been foolproof, but the intent is to give them the freedom to decide their online presence when they’re grown. My approach might not be the norm, but I’ve received enough sincere questions about it that I wanted to clarify my perspective. This is not a directive for others but my personal choice for preserving my family’s privacy.
I’d love to hear your perspective on this. Do you share your kids’ lives online? How did you decide on your approach? Let’s chat about it in the comments!
